Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Ditching some old posts

I have made some posts I'm not altogether happy with, and then deleted them with the intention of condensing them.

The gist of those posts:

-I'm a zoosexual zoophile and, to some extent, a furry.  This means, in practice, that I'm sexually attracted to animals and not to other humans.
-I'm a born-again Christian.  I believe in God, and I believe Jesus is the Son of God.  I love Jesus and I love my family and my Christian friends.
-I'm a virgin and plan to spend my whole life as a virgin because I feel that the consequences attached to bestiality - social, psychological, moral and legal - are unacceptable.

This said, I feel that God accepts, and is not particularly upset by, the fact that I masturbate and view animal/furry porn, as  a substitute for doing something worse.  He knows what I'm struggling with and understands that I'm pretty messed up - and that the sexual orientation I have is not my fault.

He knows I didn't choose to be zoo, and that I've tried desperately to quit masturbating, and to change or remove my sexual desires, for years now.  I prayed about it, prayed for healing.  I eventually confessed to him and to myself that I could not overcome this, and was exhausted from trying to, and wept that he did not answer my prayers.

I openly and honestly confessed my weakness to others and others have prayed for me.  I am still zoosexual.
I began to realize, eventually, that God had me stuck this way for a reason, and that that reason was simple.

God wanted me to help bridge the gap between zoosexuals and the Christian church.

He wants me to be a light in a dark place.  He wants me to tell the zoosexuals that God loves them - regardless of their sin issues - and that God wants to forgive them, help them, and be their friend.

As for Christians, I want them to learn to love zoosexual people.  I am a zoosexual and my Christian friends know this, and they accept me as a friend anyway.  I want to see the church at large be more like the local church I attend; I want to see, as one witticism has said, "Separation of Church and Hate".